Sleepless nights again ......

Hi there
Just saw your post and felt I had to reply as I can feel your fear and probably some element of confusion. I too wrecked my head with statistics and percentages, I read lots of medical journal articles and even got in contact with women in the USA on message boards to get some advice. In the end I decided that whatever was going to keep me alive to live a fruitful and full life was the way for me. I had 6 rounds of chemo, a full mastectomy with immediate reconstruction, radiation and a year of Herceptin as my cancer was HER 2 + . The road was very bumpy along the way, plenty of tears and pain but here I am 18 months later and I have my last dose of Herceptin in 2 weeks time. I will be on Tamoxifen for 5 years but I now feel my life is coming back and I hope to return to work in September. I dont reccomend going to through chemo if it iS def not necessary as the side effects can be long lasting way after the chemo has finished but if it gives you a chance to live, grab it with both hands. I think talking it through with your GP is a great idea and also if you have a Breast Care Nurse you should contact her as she will be able to offer advice, and also there is a nurse available to talk to you in the Irish Cancer Society. You can just ring them and they are fantastic and impartial, they also have great publications for you to read, but in the end, remember it is totally your decision and the doctors will respect that, and give you the best treatment available. I hope you managed to get some sleep and are enjoying your Sunday.
Love and lights

Sinéad

Hi so new to all this myself and waiting on oncology apt. But my breast care nurse did say not to take everything they say literally as they talk a lot in percentages and life expectency. If I take it literal I might come out in tears thinking my surgery didn't change my outlook which in fact it has. My cancer is technically out of my body and hasn't spread past my lymph nodes and my scans are clear. But oncologists will look at things like lymph node involvement and outcomes but my surgeon said to remember that the tumours are out of my body and my scans are clear.

Hi
My oncologist also gave the percentages but in the next breath he said you are young (45) with a young family who you want to be there for and I think you should take it all. Up to that point I wanted so much not to have chemo, way more in a panic over that than surgery.
Now,I might have scared people when I posted after my first chemo, cos i felt so bad but I had the second one yest, and with new tablets im doing much better.
Hope this helps in some way.
Josephine

Thanks Josephine,
I have decided to go for the combined treatment, chemo + hormone . I just think the difference in the % is too big. I also went to my own dr and showed her the paperwork while not telling her my view, and she say to get the combined therapy. She also added as she knows me well and knows I will be able for it. I am a young 50 year old with 3 children and I have plenty of living to do. I have to meet with my onco dr this Friday to tell him. I have told my bc nurse I want the chemo and she said they just needed me to say it. I know all the side effects but I will put up with anything in order to live longer. My own dr said the reason I was given % and not just been told you are having hormone or you are having chemo is cos I am fell into the grey area. my only fear is of cancer returning so I will do every thing possible. I would hate if I just took the hormone treatment ( while been given the offer of chemo ) and the cancer returning in say 10, 12 years I would then be saying why did I not take the chemo when I had the chance. I know hormone treatment works perfect for many cancers , but as I said my cancer fell in the grey area. I feel very relaxed and at peace with my discussion, just wish things would hurry up and start so the next phase begins. The sooner everything begins the nearer the light is at the end of the tunnel. Glad your second chemo went better and hopefully the rest will go even better.
Take care G x

Hi G
That's great you have been able to make a decision and feel ok with it. I agree, anything to give us the best chance of living longer. I couldn't stop thinking of the chemo as poison but I've finally become grateful for it, that people actually did the research and we have a choice to have it. If it didn't exist at all, we would be much worse off. And you know, once you get started its not as scary as the waiting.

I will be having tamoxifen after.

Good luck and keep posting.

J

Did you have to make the decision based on the Oncotype test result. I'm waiting on mine, will know on Wednesday. I had a wide local excision, had lump removed, margins and nodes were clear, will be on tamoxifen for 5 years and definately will be having radiotherapy. The "will I or won't I" be having chemo is hanging over me since 28th. May when I was diagnosed in the first place. Will finally know on Wednesday and am hoping I don't fall into the grey area where I have to make the decision.

Hi Fighter, well what a difference in a week, when I ( and my husband ) went back to my onco dr. With the discussion based on the % he left us with the week before and I said I wanted the combined treatment I was told oh no You don't need chemo,that is not what I wanted you to look at, just look at the hormone % part. He said cos my cancer was small it would be over treating me if I had chemo. I asked why did he say what he had said and gave me the % to study, he could have just said ok hormone treatment and radiotherpy for you and i would have accepted it,but he said I must have mis understood him. Don't think I can even get the oncotype test as my tumour is not over 2 cm. Well my husband misunderstood him also so either we were going mad or he had a very bad way in putting his word across, don't get me wrong he seems a lovely dr so I will have to put my trust in him. I am delighted about not getting chemo but my mind was really messed about. I feel drained.Started the hormone treatment so not looking forward to the side effects. Don't know when radiotherphy starts yet. My cancer sounds the same type you had , invasive ductal cancer, grade 1, stage 2 , size 6mm, margins and lymph nodes clear. Also I got cording. I was told that is strange as you usually have to have a full node clearance to get that, lucky me
Good luck Wed.
Gina x

What a relief for you. The waiting I find is the worse part. I also got the cording - soo painful, but with the exercises and anti-inflam cream mine had reduced a lot.