Advice please

Hi Ursula

I am very sorry to hear about your Mum. This is a very difficult time for you all. Regarding advice re family conversation and support available we would very much be here to help you all with this. So often the advice and relevant support needs to be relevant to the patients situation. For example is this your Mum’s first diagnosis of cancer or has she had cancer in the past? Do you know the type of tumours your Mum has and what treatment is being suggested. Have your parents received information from your Mum’s consultant and has their GP helped them with this information. Getting answers from the hospital team and GP sometimes a second time can be necessary as it is very hard to take everything thing in the first time and also it is helpful to have questions prepared.

How to have a family conversation can very much depending on what everyone understands so far. If your parents are in shock sometimes the first approach is not what you say but how you listen. What is it that is worrying them most and maybe suggest you do out questions with them to ask the doctor. Acknowledging that this is very difficult for them but you are there to help them in any way you can will feel supportive. The hospitals and GP’s are providing a lot of support by video calls. If you could email us at cancernurseline@irishcancer.ie your phone number we could discuss this further. We also could arrange for you or either of your parents to speak to one of our counsellors. Meanwhile you might find our book ‘lost for words’ here helpful. This book makes very useful suggestions on listening and how to support your parents.

I hope this is helpful and do phone or email us for further support at this difficult time

Kind regards