Newly diagnosed
posted by Kenzie
25 May 2018

Devastated

Last reply: 06 December 2018 09:25

Today I received the most terrifying news that I have breast cancer. I'm 47. I can't remember most of what I was told because my mind went into this numb state. Something about triple negative and invasive but small in size. I am freaking out. I'm terrified I'm going to die and leave my son who's 7 without me. Hubby is very supportive but his positivity is upsetting in a weird way. He wants me to be normal until we know more but I want to scream and cry. I'm pathetic I know. Has anyone felt like me?

5 comments

Comments

commented by Irish Cancer Society
30 May 2018

30 May 2018 10:59
Hi Kenzie, Thanks for your post. I am very sorry to hear of your diagnosis and the stress and worry you are experiencing. You can feel a lot of different emotions at a time like this and it perfectly ok to feel scared, worried and sad. You may wish to talk to a nurse, you can call our Nurseline on 1800 200 700, we are open Monday to Friday 0900-1700. We would be happy to discuss the way you are feeling and may be able to help. Best wishes, Cancer Nurseline Freephone 1800 200 700
commented by Kenzie
31 May 2018

31 May 2018 18:16

Thank you for your reply. The only one received. I already feel so isolated and alone in this fight and it hasn't even begun. I'm waiting to hear from hosp with appointments for various scans then staging and treatment but in the meantime I think it's already spread. I've aches and nausea etc. I've lost so much weight in the last month I don't know how I'm going to survive and all I can do is hold back tears when I look at my young son and think I might have to say goodbye to him. I never used to feel sorry for myself for anything but Im desperately frightened.

commented by Kenzie
31 May 2018

31 May 2018 18:37

Thank you for your reply. The only one received. I already feel so isolated and alone in this fight and it hasn't even begun. I'm waiting to hear from hosp with appointments for various scans then staging and treatment but in the meantime I think it's already spread. I've aches and nausea etc. I've lost so much weight in the last month I don't know how I'm going to survive and all I can do is hold back tears when I look at my young son and think I might have to say goodbye to him. I never used to feel sorry for myself for anything but Im desperately frightened.

commented by uniboob18
24 June 2018

24 June 2018 21:45

HI Kenzie,

I only just saw your post, and I'm sorry its been almost a month without a reply. I hope you are feeling better about your diagnosis now. We've all been there - the devastation, dread and fear. It's almost impossible to describe the shock unless you've been there, and I have - 8 yrs ago. The important thing is that I received my treatment and the all clear many years ago. And you will too, you will do your time, finish your treatment and take up your life again where you left off. You will be changed - but life will be good again I promise you. Trust in your medical team, but mostly in yourself. It will take a year, but you will be happy again. Good luck.

commented by sophytc
06 December 2018

06 December 2018 09:25

Hi Kenzie.
I'm only replying now as am new to the page. I was diagnosed stage 2 triple negative in September and am on chemo. I have 2 children and can absolutely relate to your devastation. I can't offer any advice, only empathy. I think every diagnosed mother must go through this at some point. How could we not?

How are things 7 months on?

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