David Wilkins – 'Counselling has had a hugely calming effect on me'

When David Wilkins, who lived in Bray, Co. Wicklow for many years but moved to Co. Carlow in 2024, discovered a small lump in his arm in 2006, he never imagined it would end up being cancer.

Unfortunately post-surgery, David’s swelling increased and was called back a few months later. In November 2007 he received the devastating news that he had leimyosarcoma, a very rare cancer of the body’s soft tissue. David’s treatment included surgery, and extensive radiotherapy. The treatment worked and David returned to work and normal life for a number of years.

In 2015, David noticed a lump had formed on the back of his leg, which doctors once again determined to be a lipoma, but a biopsy of the lump confirmed that David’s cancer had returned. 

Thankfully after surgery no further treatment was required and once again, everything was fine for David for a number of years. In June of 2018, David took on a new role on the fundraising team at the humanitarian aid agency, GOAL. 

Then, in July 2018, David began experiencing extreme abdominal pain and attended A & E. Some scans discovered a large mass next to the pancreas, and a biopsy confirmed David’s fears, it was a large sarcoma tumour. 

In February 2019, David underwent a Whipple procedure- which removed the head of his pancreas, his duodenum, most of his bile duct and gall bladder, part of small intestine and half of his colon. His medical team reconstructed a working intestine from what was left, leaving him hospitalised for 4 weeks. 

“It took a long time for my body to get used to the gut reconstruction. I lost a lot of weight and now take about 50 tablets a day, which is annoying, but sure look! Then as if things weren’t bad enough they also found a clot in my right lung so I had to inject myself with blood thinners for 6 months.”

David returned to work in April 2019, but in August a CT scan discovered a number of secondary tumours in his liver. He was admitted to hospital once again in late Nov 2019, and had half of his liver removed.

“Then everything seemed to be ok for much of 2020, I put back on some of the weight I lost and my energy levels were good.”

But after a routine scan in February 2021, David received more bad news - further secondary tumours had been discovered in his liver. His oncologist, Dr Mark Doherty, prescribed a specialised embolisation treatment called TACE, where synthetic clots are use to deprive the tumours of blood and oxygen and they begin to die off.

Unfortunately, the treatment contributed to a blood infection, which led to him developing potentially fatal sepsis and a further 4 weeks in hospital. As a result of this, David learned that they can no longer continue TACE treatment, as the risks are too high that it could cause sepsis once again.

“The news that they were stopping my treatment came as a terrible blow. I had huge hope in the TACE treatment and had really invested in it emotionally.”

Since then he has undergone a number rounds of very intensive chemotherapy and blood transfusions which have thankfully caused some shrinkage in the tumours, and he was able to return to the office again in 2021 and has worked full-time ever since.

In late 2023, David learned that the cancer had spread from his soft tissue into bone tissue, which he describes as an unwelcome and worrying development. 

Following severe pain in both hips, scans showed the growth of tumours in the joints, and just after Christmas 2023, following sudden acute pain in the shoulder area, scans further revealed a spontaneous fracture of the right collarbone caused by a tumour growing inside.

These developments lead to additional courses of radiotherapy, and just before Christmas 2024, David learned the cancer had spread to his spine. He’s currently on a course of specialist drug therapy to help strengthen his bone mass.

"If there's a positive thing to take away from this, it's that the cancer is in the bone and not the soft tissue in my spine," says David. "If it was in the soft tissue, it would mean that I would eventually be unable to use my legs, which would be unthinkable. Right now, we're just keeping an eye on it, and seeing how it goes."

David admits that the last number of years have been extremely challenging, however, he remains optimistic for the future.

"I wake up in the morning and I go to bed at night, and I know I have advanced cancer - but it's not me, it's not all that I am. I've found ways to objectify the cancer, so it feels separate from me, but as time goes by, it keeps getting bigger. It's spreading, and while I don't hear a clock, I'm becoming increasingly aware of my mortality. There is a subtle sense of urgency, but I'm able to manage it. I've lived 19 years with this disease, very successfully."

David says that his family, friends and colleagues have been incredible supports to him since he received his diagnosis. He has also availed of counselling through Purple House Cancer Support in Bray and, more recently, free Irish Cancer Society-funded counselling Eist Carlow Cancer Support, and encourages anyone affected by cancer to give counselling a go.

“Men in particular, we often want to show ‘I’m fine, don’t worry about me’. But counselling has had a hugely calming effect on me and given me the tools to manage everything and to take ownership of my disease.

"What counselling does is not 'cure' you, but it's a wonderful thing to just pour all that pain out on the floor, and out of your head, but more importantly, your counsellor gives you the tools to help you realign your emotional and physical self. 

"They help you get back on track and adjust to the realities of your situation as things change. They're like a management consultant for your head. They are absolutely life savers.”