Boredom.....

Feeling a bit like that myself. Boredoutofmybiccies.com just bored of having cancer - never really get time to get truly bored with three kids. Sick of hearing people going to this party and that party - ah ha ha he and me stuck in a cocoon.

Gonna make one of the parties cancer or no cancer

I spent most of the morning buying stuff for kids on Ebay - was quite fun!!!

Oh poor you. Have you a cancer support group near you? If so ring them. It's not all about cancer but you could fill your time in there. Please don't be worrying about chemo it's bad but it's not worth worrying about it as it isn't that bad you just have to endure one bad day . I'm going in for number 5 on Monday but I've a lovely weekend in the slieve Russell first. So going to enjoy it. Don't get fed up yet as you've a long road ahead like myself that's all going to be to do with cancer and bloods and scans but think of this time next year we will all be so good. I can't wait to be cancer free then I'm booking a sun holiday I deserve it. You'll get through the chemo and you won't be bored then as you'll be too tired to be bored. Keep the chin up you'll be fine and ring the cancer support group that's what they're there for.

Thanks guys!!

Gonna ring on Monday- there's one about 20 miles away so will have to be able to drive....

I got Janice walshe as my oncologist so will be meeting her on Thursday to see what's what?? Any idea what questions I should ask???

Today has been a better day- got out for a short spin in the car, went out with my terrific mammy in law and finally managed to get the house tidy- it had been bugging me for ages! (funny how we take pleasure in simple things now?)

Anyway Mary, congrats on getting to number 5. The finish line is well and truely in sight!!!!
Deirdre hope the Xmas shopping is going well

Xx

Just back from a lovely weekend in the slieve Russell in Cavan. I'm pretty tired now and I have to be up to leave in the morning at 7am as I'm due in for mammogram and ultrasound at 9am before chemo. I'm dreading this day next week as that's my bad day. Hopefully it won't be too bad this time. Yes the end is in sight but I've had my fill of it and won't be sorry when it's over.

Janice will spell it all out very clearly to you and she wrote it down and then gave it to us. You'll know what to ask and we can help you on here if you have any questions. Do you think youll start chemo soon?

Wicklowlady,
Best of luck tomorrow,just think by this time tomorrow you will only have ONE chemo left. That thought alone will help you through the next week.
Shirls

Thanks Shirls that's what keeps me going but it's hard. I dread it just now when I'm feeling somewhat normal, very tired but ok. The Sunday after had been my worst day always so if I can get through that I will be ok and as you say only one left.

Hi there!

I dont know when chemo kick off Mary. Part of me just wants it out of the way now, but then there is the added complication of (which I wish would go away this year) Xmas!!! Generally you get the first whack 6 weeks after surgery, but that would bring me up to dec 27th.....fine by me, but may make it all a bit yucky for all round me. My drain is still in too ( although going in the right direction, but don't want to jinx it!), so I don't know if that will delay proceedings or not.....

Golly really fair play to you number 5!!!! Wish I was there....did it go fast or slow??? I can't believe Dee is on number 4 on dec 20th- only seems like yest she started the blog!!!

Best of luck tomorrow
Xxx

To be honest you'll probably be not too bad after the first one as it hadn't built up in you. It's hard to say but it does pass by like everything I suppose. I can barely remember life before I got cancer. It takes over your life. Yes I felt I wanted to get started so I could then look to the end. We are here for you when you do get started.

Thanks!!
Good luck today
Xx

Oh God I'm having a terrible weepy day today. I'm here bawling in the daycare oncology unit. I've just been told there is a dramatic reduction in my tumour and here I am crying. It's just got a little bit on top of me today. I feel like it's taking over my life, but I know I'll be fine. Come January ill be giving you all a lift.

BRILLIANT!!!!! That's bloody brilliant news Mary, and you are entitled to all the tears you want!!! It's prob a mixture of tension and relief and by god girl you ARE gonna beat this!!!!

That's put a smile on my face!!!!!

Good news! Take the baton and run.....

All I did today was decorate the Xmas tree.... But my drain is coming out sometime this week!!!! Yay!!

Get those drugs and reduce it some more and congrats!!!

Oh thanks, it is brilliant but cancer is funny you seem to cry when you should be happy & then I get a few hot flushes just to add to the mix. Did you ring cancer support clinic near you? I might ring them tomorrow I think I need them at the moment

I am relieved and ready to live life in 2013. I will be like fionnuala Britton when I get the baton.

God I don't know if there'll be a Christmas tree in our house might get hubbie to look upstairs as I think I have an artificial one somewhere which will do this year. My parents want to spoil us on Christmas Day and ill be able to taste my turkey, happy days.

Thanks again for being so supportive and I'll be here for you when you're having your chemo, we are both so going to beat this and be healthy women in 2013 xxxxxx

Yeah there is a good one near us, and they do art classes on a Wednesday!! May give that a shot!! God, am so bad at art- may find a whole new talent to uncover!!!!!?

We put up the tree.....I may not feel the spirit of Xmas fully this year, but cancer has taken enough off me- it's not going to ruin Christmas and all.....

Here is to June 2013, when I reckon I'll finish all active treatment (just recon after!!!). I really appreciate the support from you too!! God knows I'll need it once chemo starts.....

Relax and enjoy the fact that you only have ONE LEFT!!!!!!

Xx

Oh deadly I was thinking of doing art too or crafts or something. We could be budding artists ready for the Christmas fair next year lol

You're right about Christmas don't let cancer take it away from you. Will you stay at home? Mammy wants to spoil us and have us down. Mammy is 80 in feb but she's brilliant.

Jane Rothwell my surgeon has just been in and she's thrilled with my scans. Tumour is own to 1cm size of a finger nail. She will operate end of January and says it will be a very mall operation. So no need for anymore crying!!

Oh you'll get plenty of support from me. Pm or post anytime. I have my iPad so I get them immediately.

Oh it's great to be able to say I've only ONE left and the next one is my LAST one and they're talking about my operation which was way in the future when I started this.

Mary

That is so great!! 1cm!! You must take comfort in the words of your surgeon!! Any word when the operation will be??

Xmas will be with my in laws this year- we rotate every year. They are a great bunch, but wish I was with my gang...but we will be with them on the 26th.

Anything you need to know bout surgery I will try my best to help!!

Xx

Yes it is great. It's only the size of your fingernail now and the last two will zap it more. Jane said last week in January forthe operation and it will be very small op, no problem she said. She's so nice. I love them all in there they'd kill you with kindness lol. If I get good news after the operation I'm going to ask can I go on holiday before I start radiotherapy as once I start that it will tie me up for a few months. Can't believe I'm talking about the op and a holiday, it's great

My husbands parents are dead and we are not close to his family so we always spend it with my parents and I'm an only child so it's quiet enough. You'll have a great day on 26th. When do you see Janice ? She's always in great form so positive. Would we have thought last Christmas that we would be in this position? We will be better people for it though. Xxxx

We're meeting her on Thursday...... I just don't know what to expect really.....but we're this far now so no turning back...when did you start after your first meeting??

My drain is finally coming out on Thursday!!! Yay!!!

Oh great that you're getting rid of the drain another step forward.

Oh she's really nice, you can mention me if you like, Mary Molloy. She come m&s highly recommended. She'll explain it very clearly and you'll see her through it so you can ask and tell her things. She's very approachable. I met her on a Tuesday and she started me the following Monday she said I was top of her list, but I had a tumour that she wanted eliminated so she wanted to get started. You're CANCER FREE so maybe not the same urgency.

I'm dying to hear what you think of Janice and when you're starting. They'll hardly start you before Christmas which is only two weeks away.

Xxxx

Nice to know I can ask her questions and that she's approachable! But honest everyone I've met on this journey in hospital have been just fab!!

I'll let you know for sure what happens on Thursday.
Can't wait to ditch this drain now!!

Oh yes but she's very very clear when she's explaining it to you. You can ask her anything she's a lovely manner. I cried this morning because everyone was so nice to me, it gets me every time. I love them all in there they're brilliant . I know it sounds strange but I will miss them but I'll be getting my herceptin until September so I will see them.

You've only a few more 'drain' days. What's it like is it hanging out of you? I never saw one!!

Mary

I had two after the mastectomy one out of my chest and one out of my armpit where the nodes went! Basically they're a long slim tube and the end is like a small oval tennis ball.

They're a bit of a pain coz they add time onto everything and the end of the drain is pinned onto your clothes. They normally stay in a week or 2 after surgery. A month is a bit on the long side alright as they even restrict what you can wear, and I was very self conscious of it when we went out. Yesterday had a big coat over it in the shopping centre- nearly baked alive!!

But they're not awful, it's only after a month I'm a bit sick of it. If you're having a lumpectomy, will you have a drain???

Oh right I hadn't a clue what they were like. Oh you'll be glad to get rid. Haha you're lucky you're not getting hot flushes like me you would have melted.

No I won't have a drain i don't think as they are just going in and taking out any tumour that's left and the margins. Not going into the lymph nodes as they are all clear.

Talking to a girl today who like me was having a lumpectomy but when they did it her margins were iffy not cancerous but as she was so young there was a good chance that they'd turn cancerous so she had a mastectomy. I kind of was shocked but she said she was told it was very rare and she had three cancerous lymph nodes and they took all hers out.

They've done all the checks on you! It's onwards and upwards for you missus!!
One thing I've learnt in the 9 weeks I've been in he'll- everyone is different!!

Ah yes Jane told me today op will be a doddle and they know. Oh yes everyone is so different with a common thread. I'm going to ring bray cancer support tomorrow. I feel ready

Mary thats BLOODY BRILLIANT NEWS I am so delighted to hear that your tumour has decreased so much! WONDERFUL YIPIDIDODAA YIPIDI - lets all hope for great results like that - makes it all worth while mary! xxxx

Hi Wicklow lady
Great to hear your good news! Don't worry about the crying. Everything makes me cry. I went past a park with lovely xmas lights on the trees and one sec I'm admiring them and next I'm crying because it's xmas and I've had such a rotten scary year. Also our hormones are all over the place so we can't help it!
Best of luck with the rest of chemo. I only finished 6 weeks ago I'm glad to say it's a distant memory. You forget all the yuck once it's over.
I'm on the train at the moment, had radiotherapy earlier. 16 done and no side effects so far
Jo x

O Wicklow lady, your news brought tears to my eyes too. I am so, so pleased for you. Wonderful news.

This time next year you'll be flying!

Hugs

Kath

Ah thanks everyone for being so happy for me. It's great support. Yes it's great at least all my suffering wasn't in vain. Yes crying comes easy I'd say on New Year's Eve I will bawl for Ireland. As you say a pretty rotten scary year and I will be saying goodbye to and will just have had my last chemo. Highly emotional time and I've started menopause on top of everything !!

I did a bit today, put on a wash took down Christmas decorations and rooted out an artificial tree I had years ago as I've been gettin a real one in recent years but it seems so much easier to put up the artificial tree. I will decorate it tomorrow if I've the energy. So Christmas is going to happen in our house, I was on two minds whether I'd bother and as neadie says not letting cancer take Christmas from me.

Oh I'm glad radiotherapy isn't a problem for you Josephine I think I'll endure anything after the dreaded chemo. Do you use creams as they say they help?

Deefed how is your chemo going?

Not looking forward to the weekend but it'll be my second last time to go through it and yes I'll be flying next year in all ways, plenty of holidays I hope with the help of God.

Thanks again you've been great support xxxxxx

Too right!!
Get that tree up!! The brighter the better!!!!

Yes plenty of lights and balls. Positivity all the way

Glad to hear your up and about and able to put a tree up and you only had chemo today or yesterday? My mind is a fuzz.

Well I have 3 down and 5 to go - do my next one thursday week 20th. To be honest the three week cycle is so regular for me. First day just spaced and in bed early and up 4.20am (all three times) then I am just a nutcase for the weekend cant put a sentance together but not sick - that week then Monday to Friday feel fairly yuck and tired but not pukey sick thank God. Next weekend I stay in my cocoon period stay in as much as is possible with kids. Usually by the Monday (yesterday) I am in flying form. HOwever this time more tired and as one friend said listen to your body if your tired dont fight it give in to it. Very hard for me as I am constantly on the go and if I sit down I think I should be doing this that or the other. Anyhow from now til THurdsay week I will be in great form. Going partying on Friday and gonna paint the down red, have a few drinks and dance til dawn or chat til dawn!!! then its nukey time again - but honestly hasnt been as bad as I thought and have been lucky had no bugs or infection like you did you poor thing.

Hope your okay over the next couple of days good thing is you will be flying by christmas

xx

Yes it's strange I'm not too bad the first few days after which has to do with the steroids . I know if tree doesn't go up today or tomorrow that's it's until just before Christmas and after all the effort it's be nice to have it up for a while. Ive a horrible heartburn tonight which I get from all the tablets. I will be bad from Saturday, sunday is my absolute worst day. Then I start to improve on the Monday but the more I've got the worse it had got and takes longer to get over. I used to get a week and a half now I only get one good week. The taste on my mouth gets really bad and I don't eat very much. Homemade leek and potatoe soup is the only thing with cheese and crackers. I'm still not losing any weight!!!

I should have been lunching with my work girls on Friday but I won't be able. My chemo being out back a week put pay to that. I wouldn't have the energy to paint the town red. We went to slieve Russell with friends last weekend it was lovely and relaxing and I had a treatment but I was bunched after it.

You enjoy your night out you deserve it and do what your body tells you it's the only time you should be able to sit it lie down without feeling guilty.

Great news Mary u have got it on the ropes. One more nuke will give it the killer blow.

Neadi the drain will soon be no more....happy days. That was such a long time.

Dee can't believe u r back in the hot seat next week. Time seems to be flying.

Good woman Jo RT countdown and no side effects.

I had Chemo last week and hope to get out and about tomorrow leaving my old friends nausea and vomiting at home. Xmas tree is up but still working on the pre Xmas house spring clean. Beginning to be really tired from the daily trek for RT. Turning pinkish sunburned like. Lashing on the cream.

Mary will be hitting Bray cancer support after Xmas so we may be having a joint exhibition of our art work lol

Can't believe in single digits for RT and Chemo now. Jeez better not jinx it by saying I'm nearly there lol. Dane

Thanks Dane!!

Sounds like the RT is going in the right direction! Understand what you mean bout the jinx! Everytime anybody asks me bout the drain I hold off replying- won't quite believe it's gone til it's gone......

Best of luck with rest of RT!!

Hiya ladies
Dane great your down to single fidgets hope it goes well to end for you.neadi hope you get rid of the pesky drain soon.i looked liked a octopuss 2 underarm and breast and 2 in abdomen very annoying .
Tree going up tomorrow as neadi said it took-enough
off us already so Christmas officially begins here with all the antibiotics steroids and inhalers.my press is going to explod soon.im a little on the board side not knowing what to do with self in the 5 mins I might get with the kids my angels that got me through.so the 'I swore I'd never have one artificiall tree goes up and girls you'll see it far and wide I'm planning on lighting up my world and go find who I am now .thank you all for reading posts ,I know I'm at the other end of the scales but one thing ice really realised is for me this has been a very lonely road.ladies on chemo wrap up warm I am on 3rd antibiotic in 4 weeks!!!typical avoided it all during 6 months chemo.so wrap up and mind yourselfs please it's a nasty dose going

XxxW

Hi wilmaone yes I said no artificial trees but needs must it was easier and it's all decorated and lighting up my sun room. No cancer not ta,king Christmas away from me. Ill probably cry my way through it but thats just the trauma and realisation of it all. I can barely remember the normal life I had before the 17th August, but I do look forward to the great life I'm going to have when all this shit is over. I'm a different person now but I think a better person. I'm going to make sure that some good comes out of this not just for me but for all who are affected by cancer.

I'm terrified of the dose that's going my parents have had chest infections and I certainly don't want that and I in the throws of post chemo.

Oh I'm really sorry you found it a very lonely road I would have to say it was the opposite with me I am overwhelmed with people's good wishes they've been there for me all the way, tremendous and of course my dearest supporters on this site. Couldn't have got through it without everyone caring so much for me. It makes me cry the most when i think of the kindness of my friends and family. There are a few which I can count on one hand that have neglected me and they'll hear it from me when I do meet them. Cancer gives you the freedom to say what you feel and that's what I'll be doing.

Yes Dane7 I think I have it on the ropes alright and feel very upbeat with only one left. Maybe this one wont be as bad and ill endure the last one because it is the last one. Oh yes can we hook up in bray after Christmas that would be brilliant. Do you live local?

Anyway going to have a little sleep now, just up taking my meds and mouth wash.

Love you all xxxxx
Mary

Mary I am in Wicklow town. Will send you a pm with my mobile and we can hook up if you like to go to Bray Cancer centre after Xmas.

Yes that would be nice. I think it has more than Wicklow cancer support . I'm in Roundwood