I am so afraid

Hi Evelyn

Just read your posting and felt compelled to reply. You brought me back to where I was a few months and the fear I felt, fear of the unknown and the overpowering sense of loneliness in the situation. I had mastectomy in Feb this year and am due my 6th of 8 chemo sessions this week. I found a lump and went for the triple assessment mammogram, ultrasound and biopsy alone. On the day the specialist was able to give me a pretty good indication of the results although they were pending the biopsy results. My advice to you, bring a friend or relative with you on Tuesday. Somebody with a positive outlook, you need support and an extra pair of ears to take in all the information. Don't dwell on the negatives, regardless of the outcome of your results, the treatments available today are wonderful and you will get through everything. As a mum of two teenagers myself I understand your concerns, and with the leaving cert right now, timing couldn't be worse, but at least the exams will be over in a couple of weeks and believe me, things will look better then.

I'll be thinking of you on Tuesday and hope that whatever the results, you'll have the strength and support to get thru this as best you can.

Hi egghead
Thank you so so much for replying to me. You read me right ie I did intend going alone tomorrow however I will now take my niece with me as she is a strong girl (a garda). It was good to hear I may get some results tomorrow as the wait is doing my head in. I think I will face whatever he tells me and deal with it once I know what it is. Once again many thanks.
Evelyn

Hi Evelyn,

I am sorry I am only seeing your post now and have missed replying BEFORE your triple assessment today so you could have had some idea of what would be done.

I am two years out from the end of my treatment for breast cancer and doing fine. I hope you come back and let us know how you got on.

Hugs,

Flo.

Hi
Well had the assesment this morning and they pretty much said what I suspected, of course I have to wait for the result of the biopsy. The nurse was a pet and very reassuring. My biopsy results will be with the team for discussion Monday morning and I see my consultant in the afternoon. Now that I pretty much know that it is cancer I feel able to cope better. Feeling a bit tender after the biopsy but no pain so going to have an early night as I had no sleep last night. Egghead and Flo thanks for your support.
Evelyn x x

Hi Evelyn,

Sorry they have pretty much confirmed your fears and are preparing you for a cancer result on Monday. I would just like to reassure you that Breast Cancer is NOT necessarily the death sentence it might have been viewed as years ago. Treatment and surgery, etc. have come a long way.

I am three years out now from my diagnosis and, despite a pretty negative prognosis, am doing fine and feeling good. There is a lot of support for anyone with a diagnosis these days. If you need someone to talk to, or need help to find your nearest support centre, you can contact me at

flohoward at eircom dot net (just leave out the spaces and use @ and . )

Hugs,

Flo.

Hi Flo
Thanks for your positive message and the support. I will e mail you over the weekend.
Evelyn x

Hi Evelyn
Was thinking of you getting your results yesterday afternoon and hope that
things went well, and that you're less in the dark now which hopefully helps.
Let me know how you progress and good luck
Egghead

Hi again egghead

Well the nurse phoned me Monday lunch time before I left for my appointment. Biopsy results they got back so far have confirmed cancer but they are waiting for more results from the biopsy to decide on my treatment. She says it will involve surgery but what type they dont know yet. My new appointment is Friday when all will be revealed to me.

I am very positive (most of the time) family and work are very supportive which helps.

Found the hardest part was telling my 2 children but they took the news well and as my daughter said we will get through this together and beat it.

Evelyn x x

Pity it has to drag out till Friday but as you said, you have good support and your daughter sounds great, and she's right, you will get thru it together.

Talk soon,
xxx

Hi Evelyn,

I had replied to this post before but i dont know what happened to it, i hope friday went well for you.

i am a step or two ahead of you, i had a radical mastemectomy on the 11th of May 2009, the operation is actually o.k., not pain free but not too bad, that was seven weeks ago today. i had two lumps and they though from the scans that it was in my nodes, but it turned out it was 1 lump of 8cm and the nodes were clear, for whatever reason they were enlarged they were cancer free thank god. i am perfect after the op, the scar is big and ugly but i was warned of that before the op as the cancer was large and had grown along the chest wall, so to get the clear margin it was necessary. but already it is getting neater and putting on the fake boob is only like changing you underwear in the morning now.

i massage it every day with oil to reduce the scar tissue, but had healed so well at five weeks they told me i could start chemo and gave me my fake boob. i had triple negative breast cancer so i started chemo last monday, it is called ct for 4 goes every three weeks, and also on a trial drug avastin for 12 mths to try prevent it coming back, i will have radiation to the chest wall after the chemo, but by christmas my hair should be growing back.

just to say even if the news was bad they really don't know for sure till after the op, they thought my cancer was much worse until the results came back. i am not out of the woods yet and triple negative is not so good but i am cancer free at the moment and you would think i never had an op if you met me.

i am 35 and unfortuanetly we have no children, there was other plans for us.

thinking of you and if you want to ask anything feel free.

HI
I am confusing everyone and they in turn are confusing me.
I have had 2 biopsy's at this stage but the 2 pathologists cannot agree on what surgery is needed at this stage. B4 and B5 have been mentioned and surgery is different for both of them, my result was 4.5.

I am going in to have the lump and some surrounding tissue removed on Thursday morning, and they will decide then what to do with me.

As the lump is around 5 cm I know there will be a bit missing but this does not worry me. I worry that having taken the lump out they find they have to remove the breast and this would require further surgery.

I have been given a list of questions to ask my consultant through the breast nurse and I am ringing her tomorrow.

Thanks for all the support on the site.

Evelyn

HI EVELYN,

That is confusing alright, at least with me they knew it was maligniant and thought to be grade 3 stage 3 after the core biopsy results, b4 means suspicious of malignacy and b5 means maligant, so either way the lump is large and has to go, but the choice correct me if i am wrong is between a lumpectecomy and risk having to go back for more (or even whole breast and nodes (radical mastemectomy) ) or go straight for mastemectomy and risk the chance that only a lumpectomy was needed. Did they give you a choice of chemo shrinking the lump before any surgery, i suppose they would only do this if they were positive it was cancer. even if it is cancer and the nodes are clear provided they get the clear margin with the operation a lumpectomy would e enough.

best of luck with it, it is such a pity that they cant tell you what they think is best and just go with that, there is some comfort in not having a choice, i would make a list of questions and ask them probabilities based on the size of the lump, and what mri results are etc. all the waiting is the hardest part of the whole process.

take care.

Hi Evelyn,
I'm only after joining this website, and not so hot at typing, but I thought I would share with you, the goodnews about my Mammy, who had a breast removed over 24yrs ago, and has just celebrated her 80th Birthday. Maybe that will be a comfort to you, or at least be a glimmer of hope. I've had a breast 'lump' removed also, back in 2001, which thankfully proved to be benign. I had just lost my partner to cancer that year, and was determined I would fight it. Brave words, at the time. Hope you can find the strength to be positive, you will be in my thoughts and prayers. This website has been a great strength for me, hope it helps you too.
Regards, Rosie x

Hi
It's me again, beginning to feel I am taking over the site, SORRY. Truth is the replies I have got here are a great comfort to me at the moment. You are all so positive and have been through so much, I thank all of you who took the time to post a reply to me.

The waiting has caught up with me and brave Evelyn has left the building, but she will be back. Just want to get into hospital and get this little "allien" out of my body, after that I will get it together again.

Will be back on when I get more news. Once again thanks to everyone, you are amazing people.

Evelyn x x

Hi Evelyn,

To be honest, I am kind of glad to see Brave Evelyn has left the building for a little while. You have been holding everything together for the last few weeks through all your delays so you were due a bit of a meltdown. I hope you feel lighter for having let the emotion out.

Just remember that its ok to lose your bravery and positivity sometimes. I think we all do, its only human. We all try to be brave and positive but the reality is that cancer can at times be life threatening so, although treatment has come a LONG way and our chances of complete recovery are very good, we still have our days when the fear takes hold. Thats the beauty of having a support site like this, we can come here and voice our fears and worries to others who have also been there and can understand and empathise.

Hugs,

Flo.
PS - Good luck for Thurs!!

Hi Flo and everyone else

I took Flo's advice today and got my hair done for hospital tomorrow (still as vain as ever). Have an early start tomorrow so going to get an early night and TRY to sleep.

Again thanks to all you great people who took time to answer and encourage me especially Flo.

Hi Evelyn,
Haven't been online for a few days, I have friends over from Scotland for 2 weeks, four adorable and noisy children....fair takes your days up quick!
Hope you are doing OK, you have been in my thoughts constantly. Don't know if you are religious in any way, but I hope you don't mind that I lit a candle for you yesterday at Mass.
Take care, Rosie x

Hi Rosie
Many thanks for the candle I appreciate it a lot.

Still a bit tender after the lumpectecomy on Thursday but the pain killers got me through the worst. Taking it easy this week, 2 children spoiling me rotton lol. Final result on Monday next and I am ready for it after the long wait and different opinions on the lump.

Will keep you all updated.

Evelyn x x

Hey Evelyn,
Today is the first anniversary of me being told I had breast cancer - it was a major shock and I can remember driving home in a fuzz - I was reeling and didnt know how I felt for a few weeks after - Its a feeling only the people who have gone through it can identify with............
Anyway - I am here a year later - had a radical mastectomy with node clearance, 4 sessions of ac chemo and 4 sessions of taxotere chemo which ended in February 2009.......... and now I am putting it over me and getting back to work soon !!
It was a long year, theres no point saying it was very easy but I hope that you,
like me, will learn a whole new world as you go through your year. My family, friends and work colleagues were so supportive - don't be afraid to ask for help.You will be so touched by the kindness of the people who love you - it will change your attitude to life (and theirs) forever - for the good.
Take every day , one at a time and go and get a really nice wiggy with hilights.....honestly, I am hugging it goodbye these weeks - that was my first main question when diagnosed as I used to be so vain about my hair.... but it didnt bother me when I had wiggy - lots of people admired her as you would never guess she wasn't the real thing !!!!
Be sure and come back here with any questions - no matter what - and we who have been through the year will share our knowledge.......
Just think of each stage as a box you must open and only open one box at a time.....
Its do-able and there are lots of us here on this site just waiting to share cyber hugs ......

take care and keep that chin up !!!
love
ra

Hi Ra
Thanks for your story everyone here has been so good. I am taking each day as it comes just waitimg till Monday and THE RESULT.

Will be in touch

Evelyn x x

Hello again
Well the wait is over, could have been a worse result. I have grade 2 cancer. Consultant was so nice he spent a good half hour explaining things to me, I heard little but my daughter got it all.

Mastectomy left breast and removal of first gland under my arm to check that out as it's coming up clear on ultra sound but he wants to be sure. He is doing an expandable (think thats right) re construction at the same time. I should get a date within 2 weeks for the operation. He says I will probably follow thaty up with radiation abd chemo but says to get operation over first and then we will discuss that.

Crying as I type this and dont know why because I am not scared and he says I will be fine. Think it's because of my 2 children gosh they would kill me for calling them children, they are 21 and 18. Wish they did not have to go through this. As for myself I will fight this, cancer has met it's match in me, if you guys fought it then so will I.

Thank you all so very much, Evelyn

Hi Evelyn,

You've been through the mill these past few weeks and I'm sorry to hear that having had the lumpectomy you now have to go through a mastectomy. Just wanted to wish you luck with it all and to say that I also had an expander inserted at the time of my mastectomy. It actually works really well and when your op site heals in about 6 weeks you can have it gradually inflated to stretch the skin. (It must be stretched before radiotherapy, not after)

I've now finished chemo and am ready to start radiotherapy next week and am looking forward to having the final surgery to lower the new boob into the correct position. (As I'm 48 and have two old teenagers too) my good boob is headed south, so the consultant has said that as part of the service he will lift my southern one to match the new one! Just thought I'd tell you that in case you may have the same problem!!!

Will talk soon,

Youre doing great girl!!

Hi
Thanks for your message and engouragement, It is really uplifting to be able to text people who have gone through it.

Myself and "my little alien" are still fighting but I know I am going to beat it. Dont think I will be done next week so it will be the week after, more time to allow myself be pampered lol.

Evelyn

Hi Evelyn,
Thats the attitude girl !!! You will be brave and fine - last year I took about a week or two after diagnosis to ''come to terms'' with the big task ahead of me.
.........I decided to fragment it and not think of the whole process at once....
section it out....... of course you will have to think out the op before it happens and yes that is the time to deal with that........ but don't think about the next stage until it is time to think about it............ thats how I stayed strong - and I got through so I know you will too !!
I am one year out and going back to work soon - my energy is returning and I have deemed myself (so has my oncologist) as being a survivor - take the year out from work, do special things and if you have chemo or any other treatment treat those few days as a blip in the middle of a ''finding yourself'' gap.....

Stay posting - you are not taking over the site. Maybe there are other women out there who are in the same position and getting great solace from your honesty and bravery online.

take care hon,
r

hi ladies,

what a beautiful day today, the sun has been shining here in limerick all day, i had a modified radical mastemectomy 10 weeks ago tommorow and am flying it. i have had two goes of chemo so far and two more to go and then i get a break before the radiation of 4 weeks and then 30 goes or six weeks of radiaiton.

i agree that it is best to break it down in steps, they did not leave a flap or anything for a possible future reconstruction, nor was i offered any options besides removing the breast and nodes, the surgeon said that she will look at it in a years time again, when treatment will be almost finished, i am on a biological treatment for 12 months along with chemo and radiation for triple negative breast cancer.

i think this site is very quite for a discussion board and it is great that there are a few people willing to tell there stories on line for those that are just at the begining of there own journey to compare real life experiences, the breast care nurses are wonderful but sometimes if they tell you something is easy or won't hurt it raises an alert flag.

evelyn sorry to hear your news but you will get through this, i will be finished my radiation before my bday in november so time flies once the diganosis is made. i will be able to have a drink and a bit of celebration for my 36 which i had been reluctant to do since i was about 26. the scars heal quite quickly and are already changing to silvery.

take care.

Hi everyone

Thanks for all the stories, advice and most of all encouragement from you all. RoxAnn think you're right, the only way to deal with it is one step at a time. A lot of people have said this to me. Hopeful2 good luck with the rest of your treatment. FH2 and I have been in touch by phone/rext and she is a great help to me, thanks Flo.

Have treated myself to lots of new nightwear lol for "my holiday in Dublin" (the hospital). Just want to get the operation out of the way now as I am beginning to dislike the breast, is this normal ??? I feel if it was gone I would be rid of the "alien" and could get on with my life, that probely sounds daft to some of you but I am just been honest here.

Chat soon or when I get date for operation.

Evelyn x x

Hi Evelyn,
Hey, I am glad to see that sense of humour stepping in !! I understand completely what you mean about the breast not being the most popular part of
your body at the moment........... ! I was definately like that too and in a strange
kind of way could not wait to get to the operation.
One thing I noticed was that people were very up front (parden the pun) asking
me how I felt having lost the breast quickly quoting that they didn't think they could cope if it happened to them.................. Evelyn, I used say to them ''I am damn glad to be rid of it, it did me no favours whatsover'' - and that is exactly
how I felt.
So............... count the days girl to when this little bold part will get its
come-up-ance !!!
I used to love wearing cleavage tops and had one in particular that I was mad about and cried when i found it couldn't be worn again.... or so I thought..... until I got bras that have lace across the middle (thats further down the line for you evelyn but when you open that box get back to me)......and heck I am wearing all my old girly tops again - i will think about recon. next year but for this year I am building up my health again and enjoying myself !!!

have a lovley day...............and tell your sense of humour to stick in there hon !!!
r

Hi Evelyn,
forget what i said about the lacy bra's etc..... sher you are getting the recon. done with the op (or progressing towards it)......lucky you.
Thats all the better for you !!!!
\feel privilaged because i don't know anyone who was offered this !!

continue having a nice day !!!

r

Hi there Evelyn,

Glad to see you are treating yourself to some new nightwear, etc, and spoiling yourself - this is one of the best excuses to do so we could ever have. I may be having my bilateral mastectomy with expander recon on Mon 3rd Aug (if a bed is availalbe) and am in buying and planning mode at the moment!

Here is a list of tips I was given:

- get button front PJs (u will prob be too sore to pull something over your head)
- bring a long shoelace so u can hang yr drains around yr nexk while showering
- bring some safety pins (to pin your drains to your PJs)
- baby wipes, baby wipes, baby wipes
- bottles of water with sports tops
- make and freeze dinners beforehand
- use extra pillows (or V shape pillow) to support/cushion yrself
- stretchy vests or camis to gently support post op breast(s)*
- walkman, ipod, mp3 player to entertain yourself
- some people like silky or satin PJs cos it makes moving in bed easier
- fruit. veg and high fibre diet and or laxative to prevent constipation post op

* not always possible as some surgeons want u to wear a non wire supportive bra

I won't be using ALL of these but I said I'd let u know in case any of them help u.

Good luck,
Flo.

Wouldn't it be funny if we ended up in at the same time???

Hi all

You know writting/receiving mail here is like having a bunch of "my friends" over for a coffee and a chat. You are the most positive strong determined people I have ever met. I am so proud to be a member of "your club". . . . . I will admit when I heard the word cancer I did not want to join the club however listening to all of you I am not afraid anymore, Thanks.

Roxanne I am taking your advice re the set of boxes and it's working, Iam having a good week so far. Flo thanks for the list I will print it out for myself as there are lots of good tips on it. Flo as you know I am hoping to get in next week however in saying that it would be fun to be in with you, the hospital would not know what hit it lol.

Thats enough for tonight, Evelyn x x x

hi Flo and Eve,

best of luck to both of you -

.......... about your list. I didnt have the long laces for the drains....mmmm

I took in a brightly coloured present bag (ye know the ones you get in
card shops) ...... So I did my trotting around in my dressing gown as though I was going somewhere with a beautiful present !!!! the drains were nicely hidden inside and its amazing what makes you feel good !!!

as for constipation.... if ye can stomach prune juice or yougurt and linseeds, they are the bizz !!!!

keep the humour up - its half the battle !! r

Hi again everyone

It's Evelyn back again. I had my surgery a week ago today and am home doing fine. I am tired of course and sore esp under my arm but the medications do help. I had the expander put in but until its filled up they gave me a mastectomy bra and once its on you would not know I had the surgery. My mood so far is good and I am remaining very positive.

Back to the hospital next week to the breast clinic. Dont know when I will hear about results of all the scans or the follow up treatment but will keep you posted.

Love to all x x x

Well Done Evelyn, Another big step accomplished ! I used to check the site and look for posts..... alas, you posted and I had taken a siesta from the internet....
Its great to be home I bet and yes, the 'mock boob' is a great invention !
I hope you are getting lots of tlc and treating yourself also - You are so lucky to
have the expander done - I am going back to the hospital for my yearly mammogram next week and they are going to talk to me about reconstruction at that stage but I have no ''flap'' or anything - just a very clean line after the surgery....... we'll see !! Getting used to my silicone boobie insert but I guess I may as well go for recon. so that all the jizsaw pieces will be back in place and no more reminders of 2008 !!!!
I have gone back to work for two days a week and its great - good to keep up with my work mates who were very good and kept me up high in the sky if I had any notion of getting the blues !!
keep up being positive - its a great medicine - along with plenty rest and pampering !! Look on this time as ''time out to discover yourself'' - I know that like me and many others you will come out the other side with a whole new set of values, deepened friendships and a great attitude to life - I have cut out worrying about the small stuff - I just make every minute enjoyable and fun - keep smiling honey and keep asking us those questions.....
hi everyone else on this thread too - we should have a little vote to rename the thread with a positive slogan ???? lets think one up !!!

cheers
r

Hi Roxann and everyone else

Still doing great and positive. Had a lot of pain and hardness under my arm last weekend. Went to my appointment in clinic on Monday and consultant drew off 2 litres of fluid, this was causing the pain, felt the pain go straight away. Starting to feel the same type of pain tonight but no hardness think I will ring the breast nurse tomorrow as she explained it could happen again.

Waiting now to see another doctor to arrange chemo, I dont need radio therapy thankfully. Will discuss the type of chemo with him but I asked and was told the type of chemo I will be getting will result in hair loss. This I will deal with when it happens as I am very in love with my hair. When my hair is good Evelyn is good so this gonna knock me a bit I fear. Yes I know I can get a wig BUT . . . . .

Catch you all again x x x

Hi Evelyn,

Sorry I have been missing in action a bit lately. Glad to hear you got some relief when they drained the fluid. But saw your text that you had another litre drained after this post. I hope that was the end of it for you and there was no further buildup.

Chemo - Yes, the hair loss part of chemo can be very difficult. I coped ok but i met many women during treatment who said it was one of the worst bits for them. Some of the ways they coped was to spoil and pamper themselves in other ways. If having your hair done is something you love, try substituting with a complimentary therapy each month instead, or something similar. Or maybe occupy yourself with getting the best wig you can (this is best done BEFORE you start to lose your hair). Or get multiple wigs(if you can afford it - only one is free), as one friend of mine did - she actually named them and completely embraced the different looks/persona each gave her! Another lady in my local cancer support centre concentrated on her makeup instead of her hair. She didn't like her wig so only wore headscarves but her eyes in particular were always very dramatic and beautifully done.

Just try to remember that the hair loss is temporary. And you are doing it to make sure you are around for a long time to come. And (I think I have said this before - a lot!) I found visualisation helped me - I 'saw' the chemo coursing through my veins zapping any stray cancer cell it came across in my body. Space invader style! :-)

And there are 'some' positives to it - no shaving or waxing needed for a while, less time required to get ready to go out, etc. Yeah, not much help I know. But you can do this. You have gotten through the diagnosis. And now the surgery. With no radiotherapy required, the chemo is the last stage before you can focus on ordinary things again.

Hugs,

Flo.

Hi all

Well still doing well, up to clinic each week as a lot of fluid seems to be building. Have had it drained 3 times now and back again next Monday they think for same. Also got wee infection but antibiotics cleared that up quickly. Still no word on chemo as the fluid has to stop gathering first.

Birthday yesterday 49 and took first step towards the hair and got it cut short. My daughter Sinéad says it takes 10 years off me lol. Still dont know the person looking back at me in the mirror but will get used to it.

No pain and form good so things are positive. My daughter got a temp teaching job locally so will have her company now for the year which will be great.

Hugs to all Evelyn

Dear Evelyn,

i had the last dose of chemo on monday and finished the steroids yesterday evening, i am tired but elated, working today but only in for a few hours to sort a few things. i have the pre radiation scan on monday to plan the area and will be starting that in three weeks so nearly there. Chemo was not as hard as i thought, i lost all my hair and i had a good head of it, i got a wig but only wear it for occasions, i have been out on the third week of all treatments, not drinking but a nice meal and a few minerals.

my bloods were very good each time despite eating rubbish on steroids as could taste nothing and had a hangover appetite, i found exercise very good to help me through it, just a gentle walk for a few miles and it releives stress, constipation and helps me sleep. i was on tc chemo with avastin.

i have also planned a few breaks away with the super value breaks to give my self an extra treat as i am not spending on clothes, hair or drink. belated happy birthday to you.

take care.

Hi Hopeful2 and all

Delighted you finished your chemo and went into work for a while . . . gives me more positive thoughts to be thinking. In terms of the wig business I will wait and see what it looks like and if I dont have to wear it I will do as Flo suggests and get some nice scarves.

Nurse rang this morning (they are so good) and as the fluid has "once again" built up I have to go up tomorrow Friday. She said there was no point waiting and in discomfort all weekend so Dublin here I come again. I am beginning to think I live in Eccles Street lol.

Tired tonight so I will end my saga there.

Thinking of you all out there.

Evelyn x x x

Hi Evelyn,

Belated happy birthday !! Hope you are doing ok and got on well today with your fluid drain..... every day is a day nearer to getting back to ordinary life again.... if you google wigs/chemo you will see that there are some fantastic styles out there - I, like you, cut my hair short before i went for chemo and then went and got a wiggy the same.... however, i hated it and went back and got a long hair one (shoulder length) with hi-lights in it - it was fab and when I was out shopping it used to get admired all the time by people who did not realise it was a wiggy !!! the length also made me more confident - the short wiggy felt like I was balancing it but the longer one felt like my own hair..... and as hopeful2 said there are advantages.....my hubby loved the fact that i could go into the shower come out and my hair was already done !!!! I, like you, used to spend hours priming my hair, I loved it so much !!! People vary, I didn't ever wear scarfs going out because with wiggy I was just another person going about life, with the scarf I felt ''sick'' but you are going for chemo at a good time of year because at least wolly hats won't look out of place and you can put lots of gimics on your christmas list...... you can get hairband thingies on the internet that just have a fringe and a little hair sticking out at the end - it just makes your wolly hat look more ordinary !!
My hair began to drop out about twenty days after the first chemo.....I took a bottle of wine to the hairdresser and made a positive occasion of it !!!!!!
Of course I had tears about it and even making the appoointment to look at wigs was a very difficult phonecall to make but go to a few places and get a few opinions - your daughter will have great ideas too i'm sure - congrads to her on getting a job nearby - Lady Luck has been good to her and will be waving her wand at you too honey !! Honestly, the wiggy was something I got very used to eventhough before I got it I was devastated at the thought.
heck, I even went to our work christmas party and was one of the main nightclubbers on the night - long copper highlighted hair - I was the bizz !!!!
So - keep smiling and get a nice wiggy - I suggest with highlights as people ''not in the know'' don't realise that it could be a wiggy if it has hi-lights ...... our community secret here lol........ !!

take care and keep positive and posting !!!
r

Hi RoxAnn
Gonna be a short message this time as I am in tears at your message. . .How can you all be so positive and full of good advice and friendly to a total stranger.

Sorry just having a bad morning not normally like this. Cannot explain how I feel hell I dont even know how I feel myself so how can I put it into words.

Will be back later as my normal self.

Evelyn x x

Hey Evelyn,
as the saying goes there are no strangers here.... just friends who have not yet met !!

its like cyber coffee time....... maybe some day we will meet in a ''real'' cafe - wouldn't it be fun .......

take care and keep posting pal !!

Hi all

The "normal " Evelyn has returned. Yesterday was just an off day. Had a chat with Flo last night and we are going to meet up.

Rested plenty over the weekend so fit for anything now again. The travelling to Dublin just makes me tired and puts me off sometimes. I think I was in dreamland and thought once I had the mastecomy that would be me finished. But you all know it's not that cut and dry.

Hate my short hair but cannot stick it back lol. Look out long wig here I come and I might never take it off. Think of the money I will save on cuts and colours, will put it towards a holiday next year.

Talk again soon and thanks for the support

Evelyn x x x

Well hello and so glad that the brave and positive Evelyn is around again !
Having a relaxing saturday night here - had a bold bag of taytos earlier !!
Now thats the spirit about your pending new hair - I bet you will come back in six months and say ''the hair wasn't such an ordeal after all'' - just think - you will be ''ready to go out'' at any invitation - no bad hair days- be like me and get know as ''the lady who lunchs'' !!!! Your wiggy will be lovley and cozy during the winter and glad to hear you are going for a long style.... with highlights...... you will be fantastic !!! One advice I will give is when the time comes..get your hair cut to 1/4 of an inch... that way you won't get a terrible shock when ''its done'' and you will avoid the itchy head syndrome.......
I know what you are saying about the mastectomy being over but thats where the segmentation comes in handy..... post the mastectomy envelope away now to never-never-land and prepare for the next envelope which is the chemo - You will master that with panache and style too - when I had my first chemo I text everyone that night and said ''only seven left to do'' !!!! I was always an optimist but I am like Pollyanna now - positive polly !!!
You are exactly the same timing as I was last year so hit me with any questions and believe me..... you will put it all behind you and this time next year pg you will be a new, stronger person - its amazing.
Hey, Good Housekeeping magazine is one to get this month (october editiion)
There are some fab women on it - all were in our shoes and they are so good looking , telling their stories....... worth a read !!

keep the spirits up - hope your meeting up went well - hello all - have a lovely sunday !
r ((((hugs)))))

Hi RoxAnn and everyone else

Hope you enjoyed your bad of crisps (a little of what you fancy will do no harm) and maybe a glass of vino . . . sure it's a meal in it'self.

I am plodding along nicely even though I find it all a slow process. Hard to believe I first spoke to you all way back in May. The infection did not clear up with the first 2 lots of antibiotics so am on another 2 lots. No trip to Dublin this week (to give tablets a chance to work) so will enjoy the rest.

Getting used to the lack of hair (sort of) and sure it will only be for a short time out of my life. I was never one for make up however since getting hair cut have started wearing it and I feel so confident going out now. Good feeling I have to admit.

Take care and talk again soon x x x

hello ladies,
hope all is well and that every day is positive. Evelyn, I hope those infections cleared up and that you are on the action plan again...... You are doing your treatment at a good time of the year because ''the wig'' will keep your head nice and warm and you will also be able to wear lots of hats and scarves which are all the rage.................... give a trip to penneys and get lots of hats for very little cash !! The last few weeks have been beautiful weather - enjoy the sunshine and forget the housework !!!

have a nice weekend,
r.

Hi all

Have not been on much lately was enjoying the sunshine and yes RoxAnn the housework has been left lol. My daughter has picked up some scarves and hats for me already (even though the hats look funny on me, not a hat person). I am going on Tuesday to get measured for my wig another milestone for me.

I go into hospital next Sunday for my first lot of chemo on the Monday, a cocktail of 3 different drugs. He wants me to stay in to see how it effects me ! I made the same mistake again on meeting him by going alone and a lot of what he said went in 1 ear and out the other. I rang the nurse and she is sending all the information about my routine ( drugs been used, no of sessions etc.). I should have it in post Monday and she is ringing me in the afternoon to go through it with me. Those nurses are just wonderfull people.

Take care all of ye.

Evelyn x x

hi evelyn,
so many times i have sat down to send a mail and the doorbell or the phone rang !! hope your chemo is going well - at least you are on the track and moving down now - the finishing line will be in sight soon hon.
I am back at work three days a week now so don't have as much time as before but its fine really - i could easily become a lady of leisure but our mortgage and insecure jobs tell me to work through the recession !!!
Hope the hand is doing ok - if there is a lymphodema nurse in the hospital i would advise to go and have a chat about what is good and what is bad - it might put you at ease on minding it. I tend to be reckless with mine sometimes but tg it is hholding its own since it swelled just a little a few months ago. Someone showed me the vodder method of meassaging it - worth knowing.....
isnt the weather just gorgeous - plenty walks etc.

have a lovley weekend and looking forward to hearing how your doing.

hugs,
rox

Hi Everyone

It's been a while since I have even turned on pc thus the delay in updating you all. Chemo going well, 2 cycles down 6 to go. I go up to Dublin every 2 weeks for it. No point in saying it all easy BUT it's not too bad. Tired a lot of the time no taste for food but I am not feeling ill or getting sick so I am lucky. They inserted a portcath in my chest for the chemo so the nightmare of looking for veins in my arm has been avoided. Having a few joint aches but sure that is prob old age lol.

Chat soon, Evelyn

Hi Evelyn,

Good to hear is going ok. Its certainly not pleasant. I guess its really just a case of getting through it as best you can with as little discomfort as possible. :-( Keeping visualising it zapping any stray cancer cells and it might give you some comfort when you feel yucky.

A lot of people recommend a bland diet when you are on chemo. Mashed potato, plain chicken, soups, creamed rice, stewed apple, stuff like that. And I have been told that if you are bothered by a metallic taste in your mouth that eating or sucking cubes of pineapple helps.

Keep going, you're doing great!
Hugs,

Flo.

Hello Evelyn and all on this tread.....
happy new year - Hope the last few months have been good to everyone - don't know where time goes to ........ bought a bunch of daffodils yesterday - probably forced up in some glasshouse but nevertheless a sign of spring and longer evenings !!
Got my first hair trim in 18 months last week - gosh, it felt good !! My hair is slow enough in growth - finished chemo last feb. However, its there and thats the main thing.
Got a present of 2 puppies in october - that is the reason i havent been online - nearly drove me around the twist but things are getting easier with them now and all the ''mopping up'' was worth it !!!
take care and love to all !
rox.