Hi My name is Claire and I diagnose with breast cancer . I had the operation where they remove the cancer and one lymph node which came back postive. So the sent it of for Oncotype DX which came markers 12 which is very good. But because of new research they co.e up with two options and my makers where low Im 50/50. So i have to decide whether to get all the lymph nodes removed radiation treatment and tablet but they say Im high risk of getting lymphedema. Or not to have the operation and just have radiation ct scan ones year and tablet . So I dont what to do has anyone else come across this Claire
Close friend has barely contacted me since my diagnosis.
Last reply:
14 June 2022 11:02
Hi was diagnosed with invasive ductal breast cancer in April 2022 and due to other ongoing yet to be diagnosed issues going on, I had extra tests, scans done before I had surgery last week.
A close friend has barely been in touch since my diagnosis. I had sent a few msgs without a reply until I passed her while driving and I waved at her. I got a msg to meet the next day with
our young kids for a playdate. We met up and had a chat. It was mostly me answering questions about my cancer and plan and tests etc as she hadn't been in contact prior(bar a few texts about generic kids stuff) to know what was going on. My surgery was booked for her birthday. When leaving the playdate, there was no good luck or hug or any mention of my surgery etc.
There was nice normal messages for the next 2 days about normal everyday things, kids, summer etc then nothing for 3 days.
On the day of the surgery, I was in hospital a few hours and people were messaging me with nice messages before surgery so I was replying while waiting. I sent her a little birthday gif to acknowledge her day. It was only then that she replied asking if I was in hospital already and thinking of you. I replied a short message (as nurses drs etc were in and out to me for tests and talks) saying I felt positive and calm and i told her the time I had to be in at.
I was supposed to be home that evening but due to an "episode" (reason for my extra tests etc) post surgery i was kept over night until all had settled the next day. I was sent home with 72hr holter and started on beta blockers until I'm reviewed by cardiologist in a few weeks to try figure out whats causing these spontaneous attacks. Obviously I was in a bit of pain post op too and with extra issues I felt a bit off plus I arrived home to our 3yr old with a vomiting bug. I got no msg from my friend until 3 days post op asking how I am, how was op, and that she didn't want to be annoying me asking how I am etc.
I replied with a shortened version of how all went including episode post surgery and result of that being that I've to be followed up by cardiologist too.
I didnt get a reply to this. I got a short msg 2 days later about a kid birthday party venue question and that's it.
Is it normal for a close friend to distant herself and avoid the whole cancer situation? Do you have advice on how I can approach this with her without causing insult or upset? I definitely dont want sympathy, I never want to be looked at with the "aw poor you" look. But I want to be able to chat about our lives, mine and hers good and bad like we used to. I feel if I leave it, that our friendship may end and I don't want that but I also don't want to put her on the stop with a straight out awkward question. I don't know if she cares, or if she doesn't know what to say or she doesn't want to know. I'm not sure what is going on to be honest. Sorry for the long post.
Thank you for listening. 💛
I’m 40 years old and on Tuesday I was diagnosed with breast cancer, invasive ductal carcinoma. Everything since then has just been a bit of a daze, moving through the days but without really being present.
I had an MRI on Thursday gone and have a CT scan Friday coming and a bone scan the following week. The waiting it so hard, I want it dealt with immediately.
I am a mother of 3 children, 20, 16 and 15 and my youngest has her JC in 2 weeks so I’ve made a choice not to tell any of them until that’s over to give her the best chance. I don’t know if that’s the right thing to do.
I’m absolutely petrified. I know I need to be strong and positive but right now I’m anything but. My mind is wandering to the worst places, I can’t sleep, I’m lost and in limbo and I’m really angry. I just want to wake up from this bad dream
Hi all,
I am a 44 year old man who only last week was diagnosed with stage 1 prostate cancer. while I am considered very young to have cancer of the prostate I think I am lucky that it was spotted so early. however there is always doubt and worry.
I am due to to have a full radical Prostatectomy at some stage over the summer. I am just hoping to speak to somebody else who may have had an RP. Specifically I wanted to know what life is like after the procedure.. Specifically around continence and erectile function etc?
Nice to meet you all and now be part of this community.
I was recently diagnosed with Breast cancer at present the consultant said its primary however ive to go into for a 2nd biopsy as 1st one was not adequate enough for lymph nodes so he said at present stage 1 but obv that could change?
I am 43 and I'm in utter shock as was not expecting this outcome my mother died at 51 of endometrial cancer and I always thought in the back of my head more of me possibly getting similar but never the breast I'm distraught like many others but especially about telling my young children and what the outcome might be just in limbo past two days
Hi
I've just been diagnosed with prostate cancer.
Biopsy report shows Gleason score 8 in 2 ( 2 of 5) of the 21 scores submitted, 6 in 6 of the cores.
Calculated volume of prostate is 40ml.
No perineurial invasion or extraprostatic extension.
ISUP 2014 prognostic grade group 4
Tumour replaces 80% of the most involved core.
PSA 5.4 up from 4 last Sept.
My urologist gave me the diagnosis by phone. he said the choice was between surgery and radiation treatment. I asked his opinion and he said that although he is a surgeon in my case he wouldn't recommend surgery and has referred me to a radiation specialist.
Has anyone a view on why he would not recommend surgery?
also, the biopsy report hasn't stated the stage off my cancer - does anyone know is this normal.
I am very concerned that with Gleason 8 I am not pursing the right option and also concerned about the pace at which this can develop.
Lost my dad on the 18th March 2021 to colon cancer now been told my mom has stage 4 cancer of the gallbladder. Has anybody gone through this I believe cancer of the gallbladder is quite rare.
Heartbroken daughter
I've just been diagnosed with a neuroendocrine tumour. I've been referred to the specialist team in St. Vincents. I have received an appointment for a pep scan, at the end of November. This is about a 5 week wait and I'm wondering is this the normal wait time? I'm quite anxious at the thought of the wait and feel I'm in limbo at the moment!
Hi everyone, my Mum has been diagnosed with invasive lobular breast cancer this week. She is waiting for her medical insurance sign off on a PET-CT so the hospital can stage her cancer (we know it is in her lymph nodes). We have been told this can take 4-6 weeks to get a scan date and all forms signed. It is being looked after by her consultant. This seems really long to me, is this normal? Thank you
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